Friesencold

TJ and I spent a couple nights last week watching a DVD that I ordered from Amazon called Healing Cancer From Inside Out. The DVD was split into two 1-hour segments, both of which were very informative. The first hour was about what causes cancer, why doctors continue to prescribe cancer treatments (radiation, chemotherapy, and surgery) that have such low rates of success, what drives the cancer industry, and why treating the symptoms of cancer instead of the root causes will never lead to a cure. One statement that stands out in my mind from this section of the DVD is the idea that if you gave chemotherapy drugs to a healthy person, that person would quickly become sick. Yet we give chemotherapy drugs to sick people and somehow think they can magically become well.

Another major point from the DVD is that the reason cancers recur (after supposedly going into remission) is that they never were truly eliminated in the first place because the underlying cause of the cancer was never targeted. The cancer may appear to be gone for a while, but really the cancer is still there, just waiting to come back in a new area.

A third thing that stood out to me is the idea that when a person is diagnosed with cancer, they are often made to feel there is a big rush to get the treatment started ASAP, when in reality the cancer has been in the person’s body for most likely as long as 10 years, gradually multiplying the cancer cells until there were enough for them to be detected. The doctors and researchers on the DVD spoke so calmly and reassuringly that in most cases, there is not this huge rush to start some sort of treatment immediately, but that a person has time to think it through and explore their options. Most likely, if they did nothing (meaning no conventional treatments at all), they would continue to live for several years just because it takes cancer a long time to kill a person on its own. It became very obvious through watching the DVD that it is the cancer treatment, as opposed to the cancer itself, that is most often the killer.

The big mystery of cancer was brought into the light for me in this DVD. Cancer isn’t just some random thing that happens. Cancer is made up of cells that are not healthy and that are allowed to thrive in a body that isn’t healthy. The DVD said we all deal with cancer in our lifetimes, as many as six times each, but our immune systems generally take care of the cancer before we have a chance to be diagnosed. When people are diagnosed, it’s because the cancer cells have multiplied too greatly for the immune system to be able to get rid of them.

The second half of the DVD explains that the way to build the immune system so that it can deal with the cancer cells that are continuously forming in our bodies, and amazingly, even eliminate the cancer cells once cancer has been diagnosed is to feed our bodies a mostly plant-based diet (and raw foods are best) and to eliminate most, if not all, animal products and refined foods. There was a statistic that showed the percentage of plant foods consumed back many years ago (I can’t remember how long ago it was as I wasn’t taking notes), compared with the percentage today. Today plant foods make up only about 7% of what people eat worldwide, and the other 93% is animal products and refined foods. This is exactly the opposite of how people used to eat, so that probably explains why cancer is so much more prevalent these days than in the past.

TJ and I both learned a lot from the DVD and it made us want to continue to work to improve our own diets. We already don’t eat that much meat and I rarely cook meat at home. But if we go out somewhere, we will sometimes order something with meat, and I really think that’s okay since it’s such a small part of our diet. Same with cheese. We do drink some milk, or have it on cereal a couple times a week, but in general, we attempt to minimize the animal and dairy products in our diet. The area where we feel there is room for improvement is just in eating less refined foods, such as cookies or chips or other junk food, which we’ve gotten into the habit of snacking on. There are so many healthy snacks to eat, like those bars I posted on my last post. I also recently found a recipe for a new kind of smoothie, which I’ve already made at least 3 times. It is so refreshing and healthy, especially for a mid-afternoon or nighttime snack!

Peel 2 navel oranges, and blend with 1/2 cup frozen blueberries and 1/2 cup frozen strawberries. Enjoy! And repeat as often as desired!

We are trying to raise Bauer to eat in this manner as well (meaning limited animal products and limited refined foods), and I really don’t feel that he is being deprived by not having cheese for instance, which is a staple in most kids’ diets. I honestly think that has a lot to do with why he has not gotten a single ear infection and rarely gets sick. And when he does get sick, which is usually just a cold, it lasts for 1-2 days. That is no exaggeration. I feel very thankful for his desire for healthy foods and for the health and vitality he has experienced in his first 2.5 years. Sometimes I wish I ate as well as he does! He does like a little treat every now and then, which of course, we do allow – at the moment, he asks for Trader Joe’s chocolate-covered raisins, or these Florida’s Natural all natural fruit chews.

Sometimes when he asks, though, I tell him no because I don’t want him to think that he can have those things all the time. Instead, I will offer him cut-up apple or cantaloupe or grapes, and he readily agrees to having the fruit. I think kids would eat fruit just as happily as fruit chews if we parents take the time and intentionality to have the healthier things prepared and ready for them when they ask. I know several of my friends try and do similar things with their kids, so I know it isn’t just Bauer who will eat the healthier options. I really think the main thing is to not think you have to give them what they ask for. If they are hungry, they will eat a healthy option. But now, let me step off my soapbox and end this blog soon.

If this topic is something that sounds interesting to you, I want to recommend a very informative and practical book about feeding your kids, but it also applies to feeding yourself (and your spouse). It is by Dr. Joel Fuhrman and the book is called Disease-Proof Your Child: Feeding Kids Right. It answers a lot of the questions that most people have when they first consider a diet that includes minimal meat and cheese, such as “Where do you get protein? Where do you get calcium? And where do you get iron?” We have found that those are the questions that people ask us most often when they hear that we don’t eat a lot of animal products, and this book has some very persuading information on that subject. It is hard to ignore the truth when you read scientific studies and facts that are presented throughout this book, but the thing I like so much about the book is that it is also very practical and gives lots of kid-friendly tips for getting your child to eat things besides chips, crackers, cheese, etc. There is a recipe section in the back of the book, too.

Happy Reading!

For some reason, TJ and I could not get to sleep last night. Most nights, I have no trouble at all (except for that recent night in downtown Chicago after drinking an obviously non-decaf “decaf” latte – ugghh!). And yesterday I was exhausted after being in the kitchen for 2 hours preparing a nice dinner and making more “bars” for Bauer.

Let me stop here and give this recipe for the bars because they are so healthy, so easy, and any kid oughta love them.

2 large ripe bananas (make sure they are large because it is the bananas that give the bars moisture)
1/2 cup dates, chopped
1/4 cup raw walnuts, chopped
2 cups old-fashioned oatmeal

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mash bananas in a large mixing bowl. Add chopped dates, using your fingers to spread them out in the bowl; otherwise, it will just be a clump of stuck-together date pieces. Next add chopped walnuts. Last, add oatmeal. Mix all ingredients together and press mixture into a 9 x 9 glass baking dish that has been sprayed with Pam cooking spray. Bake for 30 minutes at 350. Allow to cool and then cut into squares or bars. Makes 16 squares.

I have a friend who makes the same recipe using almonds instead of walnuts, and another friend who uses raisins instead of dates. So you can be creative and substitute. But don’t be afraid of dates if you’ve never had them. They are some kind of good.

Well, anyway, TJ and I were lying in bed around 11pm, talking, talking, talking, and not sleeping. My legs were tired, but that was the only symptom. I just felt wide awake and it didn’t help that I was also feeling kind of hungry. I was hoping to just fall asleep, but the longer I laid there, the hungrier I got and I just knew if I didn’t get up and eat something, I would probably not sleep that well or would be even hungrier at the 3am pregnancy bathroom break.

Around 11:40 (way past my bedtime), I finally made the call to get up and eat something. And TJ was happy to join me. So we decided to watch one episode of Arrested Development: Season 1, which we recently checked out from the library on the recommendation of a couple of friends and are enjoying the quirkiness of (the show, not our friends). The one we watched last night was the one with Job’s magic show and the ordeal with the legs and his girlfriend and Maeby’s decision to start wearing leather all the time and Michael’s “stealing” of the office chair. Anyone with me?

So TJ and I got our cereal and sat on the couch and watched the show and it was a fun, spontaneous thing to do. I felt much better after eating, and TJ was more relaxed after a little TV, and we could both go to sleep more readily. I think we probably only laid in bed for 5 minutes this time before we were sound asleep. So it was a good decision, even if it meant less sleep overall.

Midnight snacks remind me of my grandmother on my mom’s side. When I was a little girl and would spend the night at her house in Charlotte, I would always ask her to get me up whenever she got up for her midnight snack. I don’t know if she usually got up for a midnight snack even when I wasn’t there, or if it was just something she did when I visited, but I remember several times that she would wake me up (I can’t imagine waking Bauer for any reason once he is actually asleep, but then again, I was probably 9 or 10 at the time and not 2) and we would go downstairs to the kitchen and have peanut butter on Saltine crackers. I doubt if I brushed my teeth afterwards and I still never had a cavity till this year. But I have a good memory of me and my grandmother.

And now I have another good memory of me and TJ having our own midnight snack and watching Arrested Development.

It seems that many of the books I’m reading are overlapping and I think it is on purpose (not my purpose).

I just got done with Mudhouse Sabbath by Lauren Winner and in it, she makes a lot of parallels between how Jews live out their faith and how Christians live out theirs. Lauren converted to Orthodox Judaism before converting back to Christianity, and through her immersion in the Jewish faith, she has a lot of insight into what Christians can learn from Jews in terms of how they can live out their faith more meaningfully and more intentionally. I learned so many things from Mudhouse Sabbath, on topics ranging from the Sabbath (obviously) to Hospitality to Prayer to Eating. All things that Christians should care about because God cares about. I am really hoping this book is one that our small group can go through together because I think I would get even more from it by discussing it with others.

The one part of the book that stood out to me above the rest was the chapter on prayer and on how liturgical prayer (prayer that is repeated at certain times day after day) can be so helpful as a guide to communicating with God. She had a line in the book about how fickle our feelings are when we are trying to talk to God and how often we just talk to him about our feelings, whether they happen to be good feelings or bad feelings on any given day. Not to say, God isn’t interested in our feelings, but there does seem to be something to the idea that praying a prayer that has been prayed for ages and ages past, including prayers that are direct from the Scriptures, can do wonders for changing our feelings to align with who God is and the realization that He is enough. I need to be reminded to repent, to surrender, to adore. Those things don’t come naturally to me, but I’d like them to be worked into the fiber of my being by working them into the daily fabric of my life through the reading of liturgy.

At this point, I am considering The Book of Common Prayer (put out by the Episcopal Church and which Lauren refers to in her book) and The Divine Hours (recommended to me by my friend Miska). I am trying to get them both from the library so I can review them before buying one or the other. My mom even suggested I go by a local Episcopal church and see if they have a copy of The Book of Common Prayer I can borrow. My mom grew up in the Episcopal Church, and I’ll have to say, that plus my new desire for liturgy makes me want to visit one.

Also reading Madeleine L’Engle’s Crosswicks Journal Series brings similar thoughts into my mind and heart. She talks often about the church’s liturgical calendar and refers to her daily readings. I’m currently in the 3rd book of this series, The Irrational Season, and the book is broken down into chapters that correspond with the different seasons of the year based on the liturgical calendar of the Church (such as Advent, Epiphany, and Lent). Today I started the Lent chapter and the next couple chapters are Good Friday and Easter. I do not think this just happened to me in this week of this year.

The first book of Lauren Winner’s that I read, Girl Meets God, was similar in that the book was sectioned by the Church’s calendar of Holy Days, from Advent to Christmas to Epiphany to Lent and so on. In this book, she told her story of converting to Judaism and what that meant in her life during each of these seasons (some were called different names as a part of Judaism), as well as how she experiences her new way of life as a Christian in each of the same seasons.

And now for how Rob Bell connects. Rob Bell is the author of 2 books I’ve read: Velvet Elvis and Sex God, and the guy who puts together and speaks in the short films known as NOOMA, which is what my women’s small group at Connections is exploring this semester, as well as what our small group is currently participating in together. So lots of Rob Bell in my life at the moment. I like his way of thinking, though, so I don’t mind. He gives a lot of the Jewish background of things, such as Jewish words and Jewish history and how they relate to life for Christians today. I always think, as I’m reading Lauren Winner’s stuff, that Rob Bell ought to read this, except I’m sure he probably already did. And she’s probably read him too. And I hope Anne Lamott has read both of them.

I know Anne Lamott reads Elizabeth Berg because she said so at her recent speaking engagement I attended. Not to mention, Elizabeth Berg was in fact there! But I’ve already expressed my happiness over that. To hear Anne say she reads Elizabeth, and knowing I read them both, made me really happy. Why is it that I want all my favorite authors to like each other?

I had a mind to ask Anne Lamott if she reads Alexander McCall Smith? He is the best and most interesting story teller I have ever read, and must be about the smartest man on the planet. I love his style of writing and can’t get enough of three of his series: The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency Series, The 44 Scotland Street Series, and The Sunday Philosophy Club Series. I am all caught up on all of these series and the second a new book comes out, I’m there. But Alexander McCall Smith has nothing to do with Rob Bell, Lauren Winner, Anne Lamott, or Elizabeth Berg. Except for the fact that all of these writers touch me in a place that heals me and gives me life and meaning and hope. And that is no small matter.

“Reading and books are medicine. Stories are written and told by and for people who have been broken, but who have risen up, or will rise, if attention is paid to them. Those people are you and us. Stories and truth are splints for the soul, and that makes today a sacred gathering.” (A.L.)

“If you have a body, you are entitled to the full range of feelings. It comes with the package.” (Anne Lamott)

Today, I am having body issues. I just journaled for at least half an hour and have now decided I’d like to write some of my journal entry on my blog because there is nothing brave about doing this alone.

Today I am struggling with how hard it is for me to feel good about myself when I feel like I’ve eaten too much. I treat my body so poorly sometimes. I am so grateful to be reading Mudhouse Sabbath right now because one chapter in particular has really spoken to me regarding the body issues.

I don’t think my attitudes toward my body are, in general, very honoring to God. Basically I see my body as something to be controlled, to be conquered – and when I feel that I’m failing at the controlling and the conquering (for instance, like last night at our Connections social, when I know I ate more than I needed and more than my body was hungry for, simply because the food tasted so delicious and I had come to eat), I begin to feel very discouraged and down on myself and I struggle a lot with feelings of regret and frustration at myself for continuing this pattern.

I feel like many days in my life have ended this way, with feeling of regret or wishing I had eaten less or differently. Usually, knowing I can work out eases my mind some, and starting my day with a smoothie or fruit generally helps, too. But now I have this foot pain on the bottom of my right food and no idea what caused it. It’s very tender to even walk on, much less walk on the treadmill for a workout. So I’m sort of stuck having to deal with these feelings of overeating from last night, and knowing that turning to food for comfort today definitely won’t make things better, although it’s a very real temptation.

This morning I tried to wait a while for breakfast, for true hunger. When it came, I had a grapefruit on the way to take Bauer to preschool, and on my way home, I was really looking forward to having a big bowl of the new cereal I bought yesterday (which I had been craving): Honey Bunches of Oats. I fixed myself a big bowl as soon as I got home, and I’ll bet it was at least 3 servings with 2% milk, and oh so delicious. But then, instead of being done and satisfied, and without really stopping to think or be intentional in my actions, I went back to the kitchen and poured myself a little more cereal and milk. Needless to say, I was very full afterward, but nothing about me was satisfied.

I was bummed at not having had more self-control to eat a more normal portion size and bummed at how full (and uncomfortable and pregnant) I felt and bummed that it’s not really feasible for me to work out later today due to my foot and bummed, too, because I knew I’d have to wait so long now to actually feel hungry again. I was feeling quite miserable but knew there was really nothing to do except keep living. I had planned to write a few letters in my free time this morning, so I went ahead with that plan and it was a decent distraction.

I left to pick Bauer up from preschool and had planned to go straight to Whole Foods from there for a few things we needed. When I arrived at Whole Foods, I realized Bauer had peed in his pants while sitting in his carseat, and why I do not know. I had no extra clothes, and therefore no choice but to go home and change him. There was still time for a return trip to Whole Foods, and thankfully TJ was still home and could help with getting Bauer’s clothes changed, putting the car seat cover in the wash, and moving our second car seat from his car to the van.

So I was off again with Bauer to Whole Foods – wondering if it’s even worth the trouble at this point and still feeling very heavy and burdened about the food and body issues and also trying to decide if I should call someone to talk, like I know Anne Lamott would say to do. Here is where I am going to type a few of the quotes I just read from my “Goody Book” that I pulled off the bookshelf when I was thinking of what Anne Lamott would say to do.

And as I told her my bleak and embarrassing story, it felt like dirty clothes. I’d been trying to wash and dry it inside myself, in my embarrassed mind, which doesn’t really make much sense, laundry-wise. When you hang things outside, they get air, warmth, light; and you see that even with the stains and frayed collar, the garment has kept you covered and warm for a long time. (Grace Eventually)

I don’t think he was rolling his eyes impatiently at me…I don’t think much surprises him: this is how we make important changes – barely, poorly, slowly. And still, he raises his fist in triumph. (Plan B)

One secret of life is that the reason life works at all is that not everyone in your tribe is nuts on the same day. (Plan B)

I was finally able to call a couple of friends. I told them that I was lost, and fat, and had once again, in trying to give myself comfort, turned to the wrong thing…My friend pointed out, “You found your way out of danger – and disgust – through humility, and even confession – to the love of safe people. Now you are safe again. (Grace Eventually)

When I woke the next morning, I felt more kindly toward myself…The spirit lifted me and now it holds on lightly. (Grace Eventually)

But most of all he needs me to be alive in a way that makes him feel he will be able to bear adulthood. (Plan B)

As soon as I got back to Whole Foods and got ready to get out of the car, I realized I had driven off and left my purse at home, meaning I had no money or credit cards to buy anything at the store. At this point, all I could really do was sigh and think to myself that it just wasn’t meant to be. I told Bauer I was really sorry and that we’d have to just go back home (and I had no intentions of returning to Whole Foods a third time). And so I drove away sadly – not even mad by this point, just kind of dejected – and was feeling even worse about myself.

And then God showed up.

He showed up in the form of my husband, who must have noticed my purse sitting there as soon as I’d left home, and who had followed me to Whole Foods, but who couldn’t call me on my cell phone because my phone was in my purse. So just as I’m driving away from Whole Foods, I meet a little silver Civic with someone waving out the window to get my attention. It’s TJ and I realize he was looking for me his whole way there to make sure we didn’t accidentally pass one another without me seeing him. I did see that it was him and I knew it meant he had my purse, so I did a U-turn at the stoplight and drove back to Whole Foods.

I almost lost it at this point, at TJ’s kindness, at God’s kindness, at the okay-ness of everything. Yeah, maybe I feel too full and have ugly zits on my back caused by the pregnancy hormones and was about to go home disappointed and empty-handed from Whole Foods, but God proved again to be enough. And that didn’t mean I all of a sudden put on a happy face and felt completely uplifted. But it helped me keep going, and I’m still here now, and I’m trying to be kind to myself and especially to the body part of myself today.

A little bit ago, I was starting to feel hungry again, so I had a smoothie which I know my body was happy to get. I’ll have more when I’m hungry again, but for now this writing and this remembrance of God’s goodness toward me has been my food and it is the kind that satisfies.

Last night, my friend Jaime and I were 2 of 150 people who got to hear Anne Lamott speak here in Naperville. She was appearing at a tiny (and I mean tiny) chapel on the campus of North Central College. I figured every seat in the house would be a good seat, and we got there just 5 or 10 minutes after the doors opened, and we got just okay seats. Thankfully it was a small venue so no matter whether you could see all that great, everyone in the place could hear Anne speaking.

She came on at 7 pm and was just so interesting to see and hear in person. I thought she was going to give some sort of lecture or talk, similar to what TJ and I heard Rob Bell give when we saw him in Chicago. Not that Anne Lamott and Rob Bell have the same style at all, but that’s sort of what I had in mind as far as the format. It ended up being that Anne read the first chapter of her book Grace (Eventually), which is her latest book and the book that this book tour is for. The chapter she read was actually a pretty funny chapter, so she got a lot of laughs as she read it and made it her own (although it was already actually her own). I enjoyed hearing the words she wrote come from her own mouth, as if she was a story-teller.

After the reading of the chapter, Anne gave us a little update on her son Sam, who is now 18 years old and whom she has written about in a lot of her non-fiction works, so it was probably assumed people wanted to know about Sam (which I did). After the Sam update – he’s doing fine, by the way – it was Q&A time.

Although Anne probably only took about 5 questions due to time, the questions asked were pretty good ones that allowed her to share on various topics. I had a question and raised my hand a couple times, but I think where I was sitting kept her from really seeing me. I was going to ask what her thoughts on blogging are, and whether she reads any blogs. I wanted to know if she thinks blogging is too trendy to be a valid place for real writers, or just basically any thoughts she has on blogging. Oh well. My friend Gretchen who is driving to Austin to see Anne speak at a Barnes & Noble, as part of this same book tour, said she would ask my question for me if given the chance.

The question and answer I most enjoyed from this part of the engagement last night was when someone asked Anne how to find one’s own unique voice as a writer. Well, I liked that question as well as the very last one, which I’ll get to in a minute. But the one about finding one’s own voice was good because Anne said it’s okay to try to be like writers you like and even to try to write in their voice. I resonated with that a lot because sometimes when I write, I like to think of myself writing a line here or there that sounds as good as the lines of Anne Lamott herself. So without even trying to follow that advice, I realize I do that and hopefully I can do it better and better. I loved this line Anne shared last night: “Write what you’d love to come upon.” I’d love to come upon (besides Anne, of course) more Alexander McCall Smith, more Madeleine L’Engle, and more Elizabeth Berg. Those are my 4 favorites.

The last question Anne took last night, which was my second favorite, had something to do with her speaking some sort of hope to the church today. I don’t remember too much of her hope message, but I remember one thing she said about Jesus that made me think “Yes, I know that’s how he really had to be.” She talked about how Jesus never tried to force people into his way of life and he never gave up on people and he never turned them away. If he was talking with someone who just wasn’t getting what he was saying, or who was arguing with him, or who was just being difficult, Jesus never rolled his eyes or turned the other way, having given up hope on that person. He would probably say to this other person something like, “Hey, you know what, I’m going to go over here for a little while because this conversation is making us both a little crazy. We’ll talk again later, like after dinner or something.” So inclusive, so generous, so full of grace. That is the Jesus that Anne Lamott described and that is the Jesus that gives us who are part of the church hope for our churches and for ourselves and for the world.

So there you have my Anne Lamott-in-person story. Obviously, she was my first favorite last night, and I was so glad to get to experience her together with a friend.

My second favorite was a big bonus! Elizabeth Berg was there, in the audience last night. A couple times during her speaking, Anne mentioned Elizabeth Berg (once was when she was listing some of her favorite authors) and when she mentioned her name, she also motioned upward toward the balcony. Right away, I turned to Jaime and was like, “is she here?” Later on, Anne did it again and as soon as I remembered that Elizabeth Berg is from Chicago, I realized that she probably was in fact there in person.

After it was over, and Jaime and I had gotten our books signed by Annie, as her friends call her, (by the way, we were numbers 16 and 17 for the book signing!), I decided to ask one of the people working the book table if Elizabeth Berg was actually there. It turns out she was, and Jaime and I got to go upstairs to this sitting area right outside the balcony and there she sat, just sitting there by herself reading a book. I went over and asked Elizabeth if I could have her autograph. I was so excited to see her in person and tell her I am currently reading her book Dream When You’re Feeling Blue, and how much I like her writing style and the way she writes about all different people in all different walks of life and time periods and it’s all so interesting. She seemed very nice and was more than happy to sign my “Goody Book.” This is the scrapbook-type book I had brought along to get Anne Lamott to sign. It’s a place where I write down quotes from the books of all my favorite authors, as well as stick other little unique quotes or cards or newspaper clippings, etc. I had Anne Lamott sign the page in there that has the quotes from my favorite of her books, Traveling Mercies. And then I had Elizabeth Berg sign the page where I had written several quotes from several different books of hers. It was perfect!

After our evening of Anne Lamott and Elizabeth Berg, Jaime and I went to Pot Belly for oreo milkshakes. That was a fun ending to our night. Later, when I got home, I finished reading Dream When You’re Feeling Blue. I love finishing a good book, because it means I get to go on to another good book. Now I’m on to Mudhouse Sabbath by Lauren Winner. And I’m definitely going to see her if she ever comes to Naperville.

I had a great weekend spending time with my friend Miska who was visiting me from SC. It was so nice to be around another Southerner (nothing against my Midwest friends). But you have to understand, you don’t even have Chick-fil-A here.

Miska and I went to downtown Chicago for the afternoon and night on Saturday and we got to eat at Bandera, which is owned by the same company as Houston’s, which is mine and TJ’s favorite restaurant. I had my favorite meal in the whole wide world – the homemade veggie burger – and Miska got the blackened fish sandwich. Oh! and we had this amazing cornbread for an appetizer. After dinner, we did a little shopping at Water Tower Place, and then my favorite thing that night was sitting in a Starbucks on Michigan Avenue drinking our mocha (Miska) and latte (me) and talking about things that matter.

My least favorite thing, however, was also to be blamed on Starbucks. I ordered a tall decaf 2% latte and the girl who made my drink even called out “decaf” when she was placing my drink on the pick up counter. But there is no way it was decaf. I couldn’t tell as I drank it, but around 12 midnight, I was wondering why I was having trouble going to sleep. By the way, we used one of our Vitality Reward Certificates (earned by doing fitness-related things with TJ’s insurance plan) and got to stay at the Courtyard Marriott just off Michigan Avenue. I know for sure I didn’t fall asleep until at least 2am. And then I was up to go to the bathroom (the dreaded pregnancy bathroom trips) around 4:15 and I know for sure I didn’t fall asleep that time till 6:30am. And then I think I slept off and on till around 8 or 8:30. All in all, I figure I slept half the night, meaning 4 hours of sleep and 4 hours of just lying there wanting to sleep. I know it was the caffeine that kept me awake because I’ve had caffeine before bed before and this is exactly how I felt the last time. I just hope there is no next time. Ever. It was pretty rough. And my bed was so comfy and my pillow was great and our room was super quiet. And there were no kids to wake us up. So that was pretty much a big bummer – to realize that one person’s mistake of pushing the wrong button on the espresso machine cost me a good night’s sleep that I was really needing.

My eyes felt so heavy the next day, but Miska and I still enjoyed our free buffet breakfast on Sunday morning at the hotel and then walking around to do a little more shopping (we spent most of our time in the four-floor Gap) before returning to Naperville. I was able to take a mini-nap, which may have only literally been 10 minutes, but it made a big difference in how I was feeling. Later in the afternoon, after Bauer was up from his nap, we all went to downtown Naperville and showed Miska around and went in a few stores and enjoyed the 45 degree weather. Nice! But we forgot to take pictures and it would have been a great opportunity since it was sunny and warmer than usual and I didn’t have to have on the hood of my hoodie

We got our favorite pizza from Lou Malnati’s for dinner and then we picked up some cookie dough from Cookie Dough Creations for dessert for later in the evening. Unfortunately they were completely out of the chocolate chip cookie dough, but fortunately there are 7 other flavors of dough to choose from. And it was the perfect opportunity for us to actually try other flavors. Normally I always resort back to chocolate chip, thinking there is no way I will like any of the others better. But this time, we got 2 kinds together in the same pint cup: M&M and Brownie Batter. Both good, but neither as good as chocolate chip. But I’m glad we know now.

Miska had to leave this morning but I’m so glad I got to spend the time with my friend. Bauer was saying tonight that he wanted Miska to come, meaning come back I guess. I told him she had to go home to see her two little boys and he says what he always does when we tell him how something is. The cutest little “oh” as in “oooohhh, so that’s what that means, or that’s what that is.” It’s one of my favorite of Bauer’s little mannerisms these days. And it’s one of the things that matter in my life.