I have had three different friends ask me unrelated questions recently and after typing out some fairly substantial responses, I figured maybe I’d get a little more bang for my buck and post them on the blog for others to see and share in, if you happen to be interested.
Friend 1 Question 1: Do you have a schedule you follow during the time TJ’s at work? You know, like a routine for the day?
Answer: To answer your question, parts of my day during the week are scheduled. Cash always goes in his crib for an hour of rest/play time each morning from about 9-10am. I love that break I get so I can spend the time with Bauer and/or do other things I need to, like take a shower or send an email or two. Usually I spend the first 20-30 min doing some sort of activity/craft/reading/etc with Bauer and the rest of the hour I take a shower and get ready for the day while Bauer watches TV. He usually watches 30-45 min in the morning and that’s it for the day. Once in a while I may let him watch 15-30 more min in the afternoon if I need the time to do something. But now that it’s nice and the kids can be outside more, I feel like we don’t need the TV as much for entertainment.
After Cash’s rest time – which by the way, is not a nap…I just put toys and books in his crib and he is very happy to play by himself for that hour. I never did that with Bauer but when Cash started to give up his morning nap, I never stopped putting him in his crib, except I just started giving him toys and leaving the light on and the curtain open so he can see outside. He doesn’t know any different and it’s the bomb to have him trained like that to be back there for an hour each morning. I definitely plan to do this with any other kids we may have – so anyway, after Cash’s rest time, we often will go and do one errand, sometimes in the van, sometimes walking. Today we drove to Costco, some days we may walk to the library or the post office, and 2x a week it is a trip to the chiropractor. We get home by about 11:30 from whatever little outing we take and then the kids play outside in the backyard while I fix lunch. We eat out there too now that the weather is nice and by 1, I have them back inside and getting ready for naps. Cash goes down by 1:15 or 1:30 and sleeps till 3:30 or 4. Bauer naps probably every 3 days, not as often as every other day but sometimes it works like that. If he naps, it’s for about 2 hours so he’s usually up just before Cash wakes up. If Bauer doesn’t nap, I make him have Quiet Reading Time in our bedroom, which is an hour of him being on our bed either reading, coloring, drawing, or doing activity books (but no toys). After his hour is up, I let him come out and play something quietly like Legos or puzzles. After about a half hour of that kind of quiet play, I will usually do something with him for a little bit until Cash wakes up or Bauer will help me get started in the kitchen on dinner prep. After they are both awake, we usually do something outside before I have to start really cooking dinner. Bauer still loves to go to the train station so sometimes we go over there to watch the trains….Bauer rides his bike and I push Cash in the stroller. Or we walk to the post office. Or play in the backyard. If we end up staying inside, Bauer might keep helping me in the kitchen while Cash has a snack or wanders around getting into trouble. Or Bauer and I may do an additional alphabet activity for his ABC book. Another favorite thing to do is listen to music, sometimes inside, sometimes in the backyard, but my favorite is on the front porch. Bauer takes his CD player out there and we sit in beach chairs on the porch and listen to his music CDs and watch the cars go by. Or the boys might be out there listening to music and having a snack on the porch while I’m inside getting more stuff done in the kitchen so when it’s time for dinner, it will go a lot quicker. Once about 5 pm rolls around, I send the kids outside to play while I fix dinner. I keep checking on them of course and they keep coming to the door for something or other anyway, so it’s not uninterrupted cooking by any means. TJ gets home by about 5:30 most of the time, so he plays with them while I finish getting dinner ready and then we eat by 5:45 or 6.
Not sure if this helps you in any way, but it does show you that we have a bit of a routine. While the boys nap, I try to sit down and do some sort of Scripture reading / praying / journaling. That is often no more than 20 minutes and not even every day. I also send emails, go through mail, fold clothes, clean up the kitchen, do research on the internet about whatever I need to figure out, make phone calls, reply to MealBaby emails, etc etc. I don’t do all of this every day obviously but that is just a sampling of the kind of stuff I do. I want to spend more time just reading for fun during their naps but it seems like I stay busy with everything but that.
I work out in the mornings, either before TJ goes to work or I’ll take the kids for a walk in the stroller first thing. I bring something easy for them to eat in the stroller and then I’ll fix smoothies when we get home. I probably work out 5 days a week and I try to do free weights every 4-5 days or so. That is something I’d do in the afternoon during their nap time or if Bauer wakes up, I’d perhaps let him watch a little more TV while I finish.
Friend 2 Question 1: We travel a lot, and it is almost impossible to find fruits and vegetables on the road. What do you guys do when you have to travel?
Answer: When we travel, I bring along a lot of our own stuff, especially for the kids, but also for myself. When we fly, I pack almond butter or sunflower seed butterĀ sandwiches for all of us and I bring along steamed sweet potato, cut into chunks, for the kids. I always have bags of veggies, like sugar snap peas, carrots, cucumbers and celery, all cut up and ready to eat. I cut up a few apples and slice them and have them in bags for the kids to eat. I bring bananas, almonds, raisins, dates, little cups of applesauce (organic, no sugar added), little cups of diced pears or peaches in their own juice…..you get the picture. When we get where we are going, I try to buy similar things that we eat at home. I’ll usually go to a grocery store and try to buy things that are healthy and not too difficult to prepare when we’re traveling. The kids really enjoy vegetarian baked beans (I drain and rinse them from the can and they eat them unheated), avocado chunks, Ezekiel 4:9 cinnamon raisin bread, and of course more fruits and veggies. I haven’t found it to be too challenging to travel and have plenty of healthy stuff to eat, but as Bauer has gotten older, I have become a little (not a lot) more flexible as far as letting him eat some junk when the occasion calls for it.
We don’t do much fast food at all, even when we travel. If we ever make it somewhere where there is a Chick-fil-A, we’ll eat there with excitement and Bauer gets the nuggets and fries and an apple juice. I still usually have food for Cash to eat, but let him have a few fries. I also make sure Bauer is eating some veggies along with his nuggets and fries and he’s pretty good about it, but even if he doesn’t want any, I know he eats so well the rest of the time, that it’s not such a big deal. We eat at Chipotle when we can because it is a healthy “fast-food-type” place. Do you have Chipotle there? All Bauer knows about McDonald’s and Burger King is that they have fish sandwiches and he thinks that sounds gross. I’m glad that’s his perception of those two joints
Friend 2 Question 2: My son has become pretty picky with food … I made all of his food when he was a baby, and he ate anything I gave him. Now that he is a toddler, he has done a 180. He still eats mostly organic fruits and vegetables, but he has his favorites and doesn’t like to try new things anymore. I know that he and Cash are pretty close in age … have you had any issues with Cash not eating some of the meals that you make? I’m a little nervous about what I am going to do if and when my son refuses to eat some of the new things.
Answer: I do feel blessed as far as Cash’s willingness to try new things. Bauer wasn’t as willing as Cash, but even so, I think my overall philosophy has been to only offer them healthy things, and even if they eat a lot of the same things, it is way better than eating a variety of junk. Bauer ate a lot of steamed sweet potato and raw cucumber when he was younger, and he still does. I think his nose even started looking orange-ish at one point (TJ remembers that, but I don’t). Some things I just don’t buy, such as yogurt or cheese sticks. Bauer knows he likes yogurt because we have bought it occasionally and his friends have it sometimes, but I just tell him that we don’t have yogurt at our house, and he really has no concept of eating cheese. I buy shredded cheese for 1 recipe I make a couple times a month and that’s all the cheese he gets (other than our occasional splurge on pizza).
So what would I do if they refused to eat what I cooked? Well, I guess I would try and see if they have a true aversion to it…..like Bauer really dislikes the texture of potatoes in this corn chowder I make, although it’s one of Cash’s favorite meals. I have learned that Bauer isn’t just saying he doesn’t like it to get out of eating it, and every time I make it, I still make him eat one good bite. I figure he may eventually learn to like it. I always plan to fix him something else when we are having corn chowder, or just let him eat the other stuff we are having at that meal. He is pretty content eating the same stuff over and over though. Every day for lunch lately, he wants an almond butter and honey sandwich, and besides that, he will often eat steamed sweet potato chunks (cold, by the way) and veggies from the veggie tray that I keep in the fridge at all times. He likes eating them plain, or dipping them in hummus, or even dipping them in ketchup (Cash, too!).
If your son were to start refusing to eat what you make, especially as you try new recipes, I think my advice would be to have other healthy options you know he likes, such as the veggies he likes or some other sides you have prepared that he likes, and let him just eat more of that, and just do your best to get him to try a bite or two of the new stuff. I wouldn’t deprive him of food altogether just because he doesn’t want the main thing you are preparing, but at the same time, I wouldn’t prepare a whole different meal for him orĀ just give him grilled cheese all the time because he likes it (not saying you do this, but I’ve heard of moms who just always fix their kids grilled cheese or something similar because their kids don’t like the meal the rest of the family is eating).
Friend 2 Question 3: Do you buy all organic? I was wondering what things you tend to buy organic and the things that you let go. It’s hard for me to buy anything conventional anymore, but I am not a millionaire, so I have to.
Answer: As far as organic goes, I always buy organic spinach, organic strawberries (fresh and frozen), and organic applesauce. I buy organic potatoes 9 times out of 10, and I used to always buy organic sweet potatoes considering how many of those the kids eat (but it became too much trouble to make special trips to Whole Foods for them and they are more than double the price usually). So now I just scrub the conventional sweet potatoes extra well and I always peel them before steaming.
I would like to buy organic grapes and apples and celery all the time as well, but have not been able to find good quality, reasonably priced organic options for those. So I always peel our apples, wash and rinse the grapes in a big bowl of water SIX times, and I wash and peel the celery. Oh yeah, I also usually buy organic carrots, not so much because I worry about the pesticides on those, but because they aren’t much more expensive and I really think they taste better.
I have recently starting buying more greens (mainly Swiss chard and kale) and if the organic selection on those looks good, I will buy those and if not, I’ll go conventional. Dr. Furhman’s newest book, Eat for Health, really inspired me to get serious about adding greens to our diet much more consistently.
Friend 3 Question 1: How is house hunting going?
Answer: We actually went through a 4-month process of trying to buy a house that was a “short sale” from Jan-April, only to find out after about 100 days that the bank said no to our offer. We went up some on our offer at that point and they were hemming and hawing (basically giving us the runaround) until they finally came back and said we could have it if we brought an extra $1,000 to the closing, as well as having the seller bring $1,000 and both realtors taking a lesser percentage than their usual cut. It all seemed a bit sketchy to us, plus we had started to feel like maybe we were trying to force something to happen that basically wasn’t going to happen on its own. We had been in prayer a lot through the whole process and it just seemed like God wasn’t giving a certain YES. Even though there wasn’t a certain NO either, we made the decision, after taking advice from some people we trust to the core, to back out of the whole process with that particular house we had been trying to get for the previous few months. TJ and I both felt very comfortable with our decision and are looking forward to spending another summer here in the house we are renting in downtown Naperville. We love the location and we especially love our backyard with our new (used) Rainbow swing set some friends passed on to us when their kids outgrew it. Tonight was our first weekly backyard BBQ of the summer with some friends and it was a joy to host them in such a pleasant setting in such pleasant late-spring weather. I definitely don’t miss Orlando this time of year! So, we are not house hunting at the moment, just trying to focus on other things that are moving forward for us (MealBaby being one of those – yay!).
Friend 3 Question 2: Any great reads?
Answer: As far as what I’m reading, well, Little Bee by Chris Cleave was my most recent read and I loved it to pieces. You may have seen this on my blog already. I have been trying to get into Cleave’s other, earlier novel called Incendiary, but I have not found it nearly as appealing. I think I may take a pass on it. My mom lent me a book called Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay and I was hoping to read that next. But I haven’t given much time to reading at all lately. I did decide to re-read Todd Cartmell’s book Respectful Kids during the month of June, and then another parenting book during July. I am excited about Respectful Kids and starting to implement some of the practical training tools. Bauer has responded quite well so far. It is so cool when you realize you can train your kids to make good choices (such as fast listening, flexible thinking, or even sitting still in the chiropractor’s waiting room) if you take the time to be intentional and to set out your expectations for them before you are in the upcoming situation. That’s something I learned from Dani Johnson’s book Grooming the Next Generation for Success. That might be my July re-read. Or the book by John Gottman called Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child. I figure I have found these few books that are full of wisdom and rather than keep trying to read new books on parenting, I should just re-read these few good ones and put them into practice, so help me God.
In no particular order, thank you to my friends Maggie, Lindsey, and Beth for the questions you asked and the blog material you provided.